Let’s Vote

Okay. We have a selection of design outlines for a Water/Fire dual-type Pokémon. The next step is to take it to the artists and have them figure out what this thing will look like, but first we have to pick one! The design submissions are all collected in the last post here – http://pokemaniacal.tumblr.com/post/40241228717/lets-recap-this-whole-making-a-pokemon-business – so I’m not going to describe them all again. Read before you vote!

P.S. There should be a poll visible in this post. PLEASE LET ME KNOW if you cannot see it!

White 2 Playthrough Journal, episode 2: Achievement Unlocked!

Our protagonists, ladies and gentlemen! That's me on the right and Jim on the left. I'm not usually a chick; I just play one on TV. Official art is copyright of Nintendo. Where we last left our intrepid heroes, Princess Leia and the Cornfield Kid, they had just left their home of Aspertia City and were marching boldly towards nearby Floccesy Town in hopes of finding Hugh, ‘cause if that kid’s left alone for too long I ain’t being held responsible for whatever happens. On the outskirts of Floccesy Town, however, we encounter… oh, good lord; it’s Alder. Alder, famous in Black and White as Unova’s Champion, is an exuberant giant of a man with flaming red hair, pecs of steel, and a poncho that makes him look like he belongs in a Peruvian folk band. He has a disturbing habit of jumping off cliffs in order to get to the ground faster, which he demonstrates now, leaping from on high to land smack in our path as we attempt to enter Floccesy Town. Alder proclaims that he is going to train us, and marches purposefully into Floccesy Town. We follow, hoping for some sage advice like “one strategy is to use Pokémon that you capture in your party!” (that is a legit quote from the official strategy guide, by the way). When we reach Alder’s house, however, it turns out that he has changed his mind. He isn’t going to train us, because we already have something we’re supposed to be doing – finding Hugh and delivering our spare Town Map. This is, admittedly, important. After all, if Hugh gets lost and starts to feel confused and alone, he could…

…anyway. Alder sends us on our way, and we wander off to the east of Floccesy Town to see what we can find. Here we meet a few trainers, who give us sage advice like ‘if you make eye contact with a trainer, you have to battle!’ and tell us how amazed we’re going to be by their Patrat (undoubtedly, it is in the top percentage of all Patrat). We encounter a typical Pokémon-style roadblock in the form of a Hiker who won’t let anyone without a Gym Badge pass, and, unimpressed, turn north to Floccesy Ranch. Here we finally track down Hugh, raring for a couple of practice battles; Jaime and Ulfric stomp him quickly enough. At this point the owners of the ranch, a husband and wife team, wander past and greet us, casually asking whether we happen to have seen a Herdier, since they have two who normally stick together, but can’t find the second one at the moment. Not to worry, it’ll surely turn up… right Hugh?

Uh… Hugh?

This is Hugh, who may be a sociopath. He is our best friend! I would trust him with my life!

Hugh is glaring at the owners with utter vitriol, fists clenched, a vein popping on his reddening brow. He demands to know how they can possibly be so nonchalant and storms off to find Herdier and make sure it hasn’t been killed or eaten or whatever. Jim and I look at each other and shrug as Hugh’s muffled obscenities fade into the distance. We split up to determine what Pokémon can be found at Floccesy Ranch. Jim almost immediately finds a Riolu, the juvenile form of his favourite Pokémon, which he captures and names Dovahkiin. We quickly determine (unsurprisingly) that Riolu is very rare here, and chalk this up to Destiny. He and I both capture Mareep as well, out of sheer Gold and Silver nostalgia, naming them Elisif and Sansa, respectively. We continue to hunt, and reflect on the number of Pokémon species we’ve found so far. Almost from the get-go, Black and White 2 have been offering us a great deal more variety than their predecessors, with Pidove, Sewaddle and Sunkern appearing on the road out of Floccesy Town in addition to the more standard Patrat and Purrloin, but Floccesy Ranch is making things very interesting indeed. We soon identify Azurill and Lillipup in addition to the Mareep, Riolu, Patrat and Pidove we’ve already noted, and later find a few Psyduck as well. If this keeps up, it’s going to make Black and White 2 much more enjoyable to replay than the previous games, which offered a grand total of five species before the first Gym battle, counting the starter (Patrat, Lillipup, Purrloin, and one of the elemental monkeys). We applaud this change, and move on. While Jim hangs around level-grinding, I wander off to find Hugh, who is searching the ranch for the missing Herdier. I decide to humour him and help look. We eventually manage to track down the sheepdog Pokémon by the sound of its barks. When Hugh realises its voice is coming from just around the corner, he dashes off to find the owner… leaving me to deal with the black-clad ginger fellow who seems to have abducted Herdier. The villain introduces himself as a member of Team Plasma, the organisation that attempted to conquer Unova two years ago. He proclaims his annoyance at being interrupted in the middle of his mission, and prepares to deal with me using his most ruthless methods: he throws a TM at me and runs away, leaving Herdier behind.

Uh… okay?

I mean… if that’s how Team Plasma handles its opponents these days… by throwing useful items at them and then legging it… well, then, honestly I’m totally fine with it. I hope one of them has a Master Ball.

This is Alder. He jumps off cliffs and we hate him. Not necessarily in that order.

Hugh drags the owner over to see Herdier, screams at him again for not being more concerned, and leaves in a huff. What can I say? Kid’s got issues. Jim and I stick around a little longer to train before heading back to Floccesy Town to consult Alder and see if he’s ready to teach us yet. Alder, for his part, seems keen to keep jerking us along. He comments in surprise that we’ve already grown a great deal in the time we’ve been away, and now he would like us to help him teach someone else! We mutter darkly that the time we’ve been away amounts to more than two thirds of the time we’ve been trainers, but grudgingly follow him into his house to indulge in practice battles with two young trainers and their elemental monkey Pokémon. This little episode seems intended to replace the Striaton Gym sequence of Black and White, which teaches new players how to make use of (and avoid falling foul of) the type chart. Alder first has you fight the monkey who is weakest against your starter Pokémon (in my case, Pansear), and then the one who is strongest (Pansage), similarly to how the Striaton Gym pits you against a Gym Leader with a type advantage, but gives you the monkey capable of defeating him. Honestly, I think the Striaton Gym’s method was clearer and more instructive, though the point was somewhat hamstrung by the very limited variety of Pokémon available, which forced the lesser Gym trainers to use Lillipup rather than actual Grass-, Water- or Fire-types. Alder’s way of doing it is neat enough, though I fear it may not be explicit or forceful enough for anyone who doesn’t already understand the system.

Alder explains to us that a new Pokémon Gym has just been opened in our hometown of Aspertia City, and suggests that we return there to check it out. This will be the subject of my next entry, though there’s one more thing to talk about today: achievements! Pokémon now has an achievement system, which is introduced to us by a very peculiar and rather pushy fellow known only as Mr. Medal as we leave Alder’s home. He hands us Medal Boxes containing a bunch of silvery disks stamped with question marks. These are ‘hint medals,’ and contain somewhat vague hints at things we can do to earn the actual medals that will replace them, like ‘catch a lot of Pokémon,’ ‘save often,’ ‘visit Pokémon centres,’ and so on. Mr. Medal has people stalking us to keep track of when we earn our medals, and will track us down at Pokémon Centres whenever he needs to deliver one. Many video games (perhaps even most, these days?) have similar systems, and although receiving medals for catching 5 Pokémon or using not-very-effective moves 10 times or whatever is a bit groan-inducing for experienced trainers, I actually think it’s quite a nice way of encouraging new players to explore everything they can do with the games and ‘learn the ropes’ as it were. It’s reasonably unobtrusive and doesn’t slow the game down much, so it’s not as if it’s getting in the way of anything, and I’m fairly happy with it.

Anyway, that’s all for now – see you next time, when we challenge the newly-minted Aspertia Gym!

Have you ever read the Cave of Dragonflies’ theory on history of pokemon training? It seemed to match-up most of what you said on how pokemon’s reasons to train. I know the franchise especially the show and manga tries to show the partnership a mutual beneficiary relationship but I felt its efforts were lopsided depending on which form of entertainment especially the game, but since its gameplay and the show being for kids.

I can’t say I have, but let’s take a look… Go go gadget Google.

You mean this, I imagine?

Hmm.

Yes, I think I would agree with most of that; it makes a great deal of sense. The theory on apricorns is… interesting, put it that way. I never thought to imagine them as a carnivorous plant that consumed Pokémon as an energy source. Apricorns and apricorn trees are normally portrayed as entirely benign; I can acknowledge the possibility that they are extremely dangerous to the unwary, but it’s still difficult to swallow (particularly given that Pineco and Beedrill have been shown not merely living in but outright infesting apricorn trees). It’s a very clever explanation, though.

There are only two other points that I have real trouble accepting.

One is that ‘experience points’ are a real and measurable property of Pokémon distinct from any real world phenomenon; I remain convinced that experience and levels are just abstractions designed to simplify the process of growth and evolution for the purposes of gameplay, and that we’re supposed to imagine Pokémon as getting not stronger exactly but more skillful and more confident. I am likewise convinced that evolution is prompted by emotional and psychological factors in many (most?) species, and closely tied to that increase in confidence and self-awareness.

The other is that humans are in some sense ‘outsiders’ in the Pokémon world, who evolved in our world and were somehow transported there. It’s true that humans are generally treated as being fundamentally different to Pokémon in some sense that’s never quite defined, but I think that the general feeling created by the franchise is that humans and Pokémon are ‘supposed’ to be together, that they developed together (granted, this could be a result of human cultural indoctrination, but honestly I’m not yet willing to rule out the possibility that the Pokémon world is the result of a Judaeo-Christian style creation by Arceus). I don’t think it’s impossible for humans to have evolved in the Pokémon world at all (putting aside the fact that it would be an astonishing coincidence), in spite of their obvious physical defects in comparison to most species of Pokémon; actually, I think that this suggests that the ability to train and command Pokémon came first, followed by superior language ability, upright stance, advanced vision, weaker musculature, and all the other attributes we associate with the evolution of anatomically modern humans.

But that’s just me. The Cave of Dragonflies version does make a lot of sense.

Let’s recap this whole ‘making a Pokémon’ business

So, I don’t know if I was making myself clear enough in this process of creating a Pokémon, so people have been getting a bit confused over what I was wanting, and on top of that I think I chose a really awful time to do it, since people were busy with Christmas and the New Year and such (including me), so I want to take a moment to recap where we are at the moment.

Here’s what’s happened so far:

1. I decide that my readers are going to create a Pokémon, as a team effort, for my amusement.

2. I take submissions on the Pokémon’s type, and hold couple of polls to narrow down the choices. Eventually we decide on Water/Fire. I have a feeling people started voting for that one in large numbers because I expressed a preference for it, which may have been a mistake in retrospect, but it’s what we’ve got so let’s stick with it for now.

3. I ask for suggestions and discussion on how to interpret Water/Fire as a type combination. At this stage I was trying to avoid actually designing a Pokémon, and instead just think of interesting ways of using the elements together in a way that could work with any of several designs (I think maybe I wasn’t clear enough about what I didn’t want at this stage). I decide not to hold a poll on this, and just retain all the ideas for posterity. Think of it as a brainstorming session. The results are here: http://pokemaniacal.tumblr.com/post/38613760900/yay-discussion. Please do have a read of these before doing anything else! The final design does not have to use all or even any of these concepts, but I think they’ll provide helpful inspiration!

4. I ask for people to start coming up with actual, concrete design ideas – no artwork yet, but written descriptions of a Pokémon’s appearance and powers, and anything else particularly important to what you have in mind. This seems to be where we got stuck, so I’ll include here the ideas I’ve received so far that matched what I was asking for. What I’m hoping for now is that people will continue to submit paragraphs like this in the comments, and that other people will discuss those ideas and suggest ways to improve them. Once that’s been going on for a while, I’ll create another poll so we can choose a single design to work with, and the next step will be to open the floor to any artists who want to take a crack at drawing this thing. Anyway, here’s what I’ve got so far:

From Finger1st: use a base model of a fish crab lobster or whatnot and have it live in a tropical area near islands with volcanoes. It’ll eat lava and stay close to surface of water to absorb sunlight to feed off of. Then have it use physical fire attacks like flare blitz which would make more sense than a flamethrower under water. Kind of like its excreting the excess lava. Also since it would feed on lava water gun wouldn’t make sense either so aqua tail or jet would also work. It could possibly be a hermit crab and use spinning attacks like fire spin, whirl pool, rapid spin,etc with an occasional apperence on land kind of amphibious.

From Adam Dreifus: I was thinking perhaps of something based off of the giant tube worm. Maybe the first form lives deep on the sea floor, where the intense water pressure crushes it into a tiny shape (represented by it being a small creature with an incredibly disproportionately high weight. The second form could be some sort of massive Cloverfeld-esque kaiju thing, it’s back covered in firey wormlike growths. There are a lot of potential ways of taking it. Perhaps it is normally trapped underwater by the terrible pressure, but the burst of heat it releases from its back can occasionally bust it loose, where it rises to reek untold havok on the neighboring shoreline. Or maybe play up the siren angle more. It uses the wormlike growths as lures to draw in sailors and seagoing pokemon in order to feed. Maybe it is some kind of Pokemon equivalent of Charybdis, where the alternating currents of hot and cool water that it releases results in a terrifyingly large whirlpool, and resultingly it is the cause of all sorts of superstition and ghost stories among seagoing folk.

In a similar vein, from Random Access: To elaborate on the tube worm design. I was thinking we should give it a fiery mane, which would look kind of like the red plumes that comes out of its mouth, except it would be around its head. Its bottom a slimy blob-like appendage which looks a lot like lava, that way if there’s a group of them it would look like they were all sticking out of a lake of lava. Unlike the tube worm, though, I think we should give it expressive eyes, ones that always look agitated because they always only want to be left alone on the sea floor.

As for characteristics, I was thinking it feeds on the energy of underwater volcanoes. I also have a really cool idea that it has a symbiotic relationship with other deep-sea pokemon. You see, the more these tube worm pokemon (lets just call them ventorms for now) feed on the volcano’s heat, the less likely the volcano is to erupt due to decreased pressure. Because of this, the other pokemon continually bring it food from the ocean’s surface in order to promote their continual growth, sort of relating it to the way real tube worms rely on bacteria from the surface to provide them with necessary compounds. However, pokemon should never come near it without a food offering as a ventorm will take this as a challenge and immediately attack the unfortunate loiterer. Ventorms also always expel extreme heat from their mouths in their attempt to relieve themselves of excess heat.

From Chewiana Jones: What if we had an enormous squid/oil lamp hybrid that lived deep in arctic oceans, getting most of its nutrients from volcanic vents and small deep-sea Pokemon prey and burning oil (for warmth) in small amounts inside its body, which could look somewhat steampunk furnace-ish structure with more organic parts like the eyes and mouth mixed in and a body made of translucent, durable membrane with golden light shining through, supported by a skeletal framework. However, when it starts to run low on oil, it flares up its flames and rises like a hot air balloon to closer to the surface. There, it hunts pokemon like Walrein and Dewgong by expelling oil like squid ink and then lighting it on fire, then eats them and uses the oil for more power.

From 4Dragons: So my idea was a two headed lizard, one head for swallowing lava, one for water. It has two seperate digestive systems and two tails. With one tail it can blast a hyperpressure blast of water, with it’s other it radiates extreme heat. When it blasts it water through it’s heat it makes steam jets. It can use it’s tails seperatly too, when it has no lava it has to use water and the same for when it has no water, it has to use lava. It lives wherever it has relativly easy acess to both, basicly on small volcanic islands.

From Andrewq: 1. Charybdis the sea monster. She kind of looks like a Kraken, all mouth and pointy teeth with tons of tentacles or flippers (if she doesn’t live in the water, which is a possibility). In Greek mythology, Charybdis swallowing and spitting out tons of water results in whirlpools in a narrow strait, but we could have instead a boiler-like belly that heats the water before it is Scald-ed out. That way, alternating currents of hot and cold water create the maritime disasters. Charybdis-mon lives in a remote cave accessible by the sea and wreaks havoc on passing ships because she’s always hungry. After she appeared, the port town she terrorized was abandoned and became a haunt of Ghost-types, who also enjoy the shrouding factor of the steam that rises continually from her whirlpools. You know how in Harry Potter, the Revulsion Jinx (“Relashio”) sends out fiery sparks if you’re on land, but a jet of boiling water if you’re underwater? I can imagine a signature move that operates like Scald if you’re battling in a wet environment but like Flamethrower if you’re high and dry.

2. Flaming alcohol-mon was created by accident in a laboratory explosion. He looks like a glowing glass beaker (not radioactive, though) and probably floats, a bit eerily. This little guy can manipulate a special kind of clear liquid that can douse fires or itself be lit on fire. You could call it flammable water… or vodka… Yet it tries in vain to put out any fire it ever sees, conscious of fire’s devastating potential. Poor guy. The hope is that if he gets stronger, he will be able to put out more fires. Flash Fire is probably a must, maybe Water Absorb or even Guts, as well.

From Crazedgamer111: My idea was the lava and water Pokemon that is either split down the middle or at the waist. I prefer at the waist because I like the “belt” idea I had. The upper and lower half of its body mix together to solidy into an earthy belt-like portion on its waist. Im thinking the name, Girdlearth, is fitting. Pronounced Gurd-learth.

Girdlearths are capable of varying extremes of emotion and strength because of their varying elements are work. Trained properly, Girdlearths can balance the opposing forces (through the use of it’s ‘belt’) and be a Pokemon of great love, companionship, and strength.

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There’s actually a fair few of these, but they were sort of scattered through the comment sections to several different posts, which made them difficult to work with and kept people from discussing them (again, I think because I wasn’t clear enough about what I didn’t want in the previous stage). Continue to create new ideas if you haven’t suggested one already, and if you can think of a way to improve an existing one, speak up! Also, if I’m still not explaining this adequately, someone, please ask me! Bear in mind that I have no idea what I’m doing here!

Next episode of the White 2 playthrough journal will be up tomorrow; this whole business of the announcement of X and Y has disrupted my plans a little by giving us all so much to think about. See you then!

Why do you think on the future of moral/ethics of pokemon? I wonder in Gen 6, they go with extreme human rights as in pokemon are a dangerous menace. Opposite of Team Plasma. BW addressed the former issue (although rather more simplistically and implied notion more people are morally better than one would think) Therefore, I always tried to distinguish games, manga, tv for they treat it differently. Interestingly in BW2, N hoped for a world with no pokeball I thought that was a bit fascinating

Y’know, I really don’t know. It’s anyone’s guess where they’ll go with the next games. (Incidentally, I think this question has been sitting in my ask box since *before* X and Y were announced).

What I always thought would be enormously fun is to have two or more criminal/enemy factions in the world, like Team Aqua and Team Magma in Emerald, who have opposed views on the relationship between humans and Pokémon. Black and White 2 (which I haven’t finished playing yet, so don’t quote me on anything) are doing something like that with Rood and his ex-Team Plasma faction, but the division between ‘good guys’ and ‘bad guys’ is still very clear there. I thought it would be really interesting to have a group dedicated to shifting the balance between humans and Pokémon, like Team Plasma, in the same storyline with a group dedicated to maintaining and exploiting the current order, like Team Rocket – because a leader like N might be your enemy because of circumstance, but no one would hate a leader like Giovanni more than him… so you have a situation that’s like “who’s the bad guy now? Why?”

…I have to do this, don’t I?

All right. Let’s get a look at you. Gotta figure out what the cringe-to-awesome ratio is.

I didn’t actually watch the Nintendo Direct broadcast when it first came out, ‘cause it was, like, the middle of the night in New Zealand and I’d been squinting at passages from Herodotus for two hours, so my immediate reaction was “I’m gettin’ too old for this $#!t.” So now you get to experience my first impressions of the broadcast as I watch it.

Brace yourselves.

Oh hi there, Satoru Iwata. Sure, I’ll listen to your… whatever. Knock yourself out.

Yay for nostalgia time. You know, I’ve always had mixed feelings about the whole two-versions thing, but he’s right, it does promote trading, and thereby interaction between players, and helps keep Pokémon from being a solitary pursuit… just as long as the damn link cable keeps working.

You have all the cool stuff from Gold and Silver to choose from, and you pick “shiny Pokémon” as the thing that defines that generation for you? Ah, whatever floats your boat, I guess.

Yes, double battles were cool, and it was neat that Ruby and Sapphire were released overseas so much more promptly than their predecessors. The wireless adapter that came with Fire Red and Leaf Green was great too, because it actually worked. You’re right, Iwata, that was a big step. Um… you don’t have any thoughts on the decision to remake Red and Blue? No? Okay, that’s cool.

And you’re rushing through the rest of the games. Yeah, I guess you’re tired of the retrospective stuff. Fair enough, I guess. Time to talk about the new 3DS games.

Hey, Pikachu; how’re you doing? Yeah, yeah, I know you’re excited, Iwata just told us OH MY GOD DID YOU JUST ELECTRIFY THE EIFFEL TOWER?

Right, trailer starts in earnest. We have mirrors, that’s pretty. And a full-sized player character image instead of a dinky little sprite, that’s a first. And… wow, okay. Yeah, I don’t know if “breathtaking” is totally fair but that is pretty. And… it looks like we actually are in France, because that doesn’t look exactly like the Eiffel Tower, but it’s close, and Pikachu was definitely in France. New region is based on Europe, I guess, the way Unova was based on New York? That’s kinda cool; I like Europe. (Please let there be a town based on Athens, please let there be a town based on Athens) Also our running shoes have been replaced with roller skates. That’s… actually kinda awesome.

AND STARTERS, with their foreign language names already set, no less. The Grass-type… Chespin, who is… I guess like a chipmunk with a chestnut helmet? And- oh, wow is that the battle interface? *ahem* Sorry. The Fire-type… Fennekin, who is… a fire-fox, which… well, yeah, y’know, that was kinda Vulpix’s thing, guys, and… yeah, okay, it sort of looks like you’ve given it psychic powers as well, which… was also Vulpix’s thing to an extent, and also Zorua’s as well, sort of, but I guess foxes are kind of important in Japanese culture and mythology so I’ll reserve judgement on that one. And, the Water-type… Froakie, who is… a frog. Well. All right. I’m guessing they never read my entry on Seismitoad but it’s not like I was expecting them to. Maybe they’ll do something else with Froakie besides give him sonic powers.

I see… lots of cool forest, a wild Pikachu, some other ‘traditional’ Pokémon… they seem to be making a point of that. I suppose that means they’re not going to do a Unova again and bar old Pokémon from their new region; hallelujah. WHOA raging columns of fire; please don’t tell me that’s a Gym; I don’t want to be bacon. And… okay, these are the new legendary Pokémon, I imagine. Giant… evil… Y-shaped bird… getting kind of a vulture vibe from this thing? I kinda think that designing a Pokémon specifically so it looks like the letter Y when seen from below is sort of a stupid design choice but it doesn’t impact too much on vulture-mon’s appearance from other angles, so I’ll let them have that one. And his counterpart… the blue crystal rainbow stag thing. Okay. Sure. Why not? I’m not really sure what they’re trying to go for with this one, because the choice of a stag and the forest setting seem to imply they’re aiming for the old ‘nature guardian’ archetype but the whole rainbow crystal aesthetic doesn’t seem to mesh with that. Hmm. I wonder what they have in mind there?

Pokémon X and Pokémon Y? Okay, so I guess you’ve finally run out of colours. After Black and White I suppose anything else would have started sounding forced. Speaking of which, there must be something significant in those names, since they wouldn’t abandon the traditional naming scheme without good reason, particularly after Black and White had such significant titles (the central theme of those games being duality, and the reconciliation of dualities). Only… what the hell do X and Y signify? Only thing that comes to mind for me is the two axes of a Cartesian plane, which… hmm. Well, they are making rather a lot of the 3D-ness of it all, as they usually do. Given that, I suppose it would make sense to have three games, X, Y, and Z to represent the three spatial axes of a three dimensional world. It doesn’t exactly have the same delightful symbolic resonance as Black and White, but I suppose I should wait for the games to come out so I can experience the plot before I give a final word on that. Based on the flaring of the letters in the logo, it looks like stag-dude’s antlers are supposed to recall the shape of an X the way birdie’s wings form a Y-shape, so… I guess they could be going for a land-and-sky thing based on X as the horizontal and Y as the vertical. Kinda paints them into a corner with Z, though, since Z is just… y’know… the other horizontal direction.

And you’re giving it a single release date for Japan and overseas! Wow, you’re really committed to this, aren’t you, Nintendo? Er… wait. Japan, the Americas, Europe and Australia. Um. Hello? New Zealand here? Um… are we Australia now? Guys?

Oh, whatever. Yes, thank you very much too, Iwata, that was… interesting.

Hmm.

This is either going to be amazing and wonderful, or a catastrophic waste of time and resources.

Possibly both.

I have to review the new Pokémon, don’t I? All of them? It’s, like, my schtick, isn’t it? And I have to do the whole “I hereby affirm/deny this Pokémon’s right to exist” thing again?

…great. Well, that’s my project for all of 2014.

I’m not totally sure what to make of this. I am made slightly uneasy by the emphasis the trailer puts on the visual aspects of the games, and the amount of work that’s going into a complete redesign of the graphics. I mean, I’m sure the games will be visually stunning, and that’s nice, don’t get me wrong, but I don’t really care all that much; I was totally happy with the old Ruby/Sapphire graphics engine. Still, that doesn’t mean they won’t be paying attention to the other aspects of the games. The graphics of Black and White were hyped too, and that didn’t stop them from having the best story the series has yet produced (continuing to reserve judgement on Black and White 2, since I still haven’t finished playing).

So I suppose my final word on this is that I don’t really do optimism, as a rule, but Pokémon X and Y haven’t made me want to beat my head against the wall. Yet.

Good grief; I’m still getting to grips with the last lot…

Pokemon moves are mostly unrealistic with the exception of things like tackle and body slam; however, in some cases there is a basic kind of “physics” to them, at least for the pokemon world. What I’m trying to ask is… are there any attacks you like the concepts of in how they’re performed and by what? Likewise are there any you particularly don’t like? example: I like moonlight, using affiliation with the moon for energy,but I don’t like how surf just conjures a wave out of nothing.

Honestly, I kinda think that trying to explain specific moves is asking for trouble. There’s such a massive variety of attacks, almost all of which are available to many different Pokémon, that you’re bound to get stuff that’s absolutely ludicrous when you stop to think about it. Surf conjuring a wave out of nothing is a bit strange, but really it’s an extension of the way Water moves in general conjure water out of nothing (there’s no way a Squirtle can have enough water inside his own body to sustain a Water Gun for more than a few seconds). And I don’t think anyone knows how Baton Pass is supposed to work.

In general, I like moves that are relatively exclusive, because those are the ones that have a very specific meaning in terms of the nature of a Pokémon’s powers. Signature moves, obviously, but also stuff like Moonlight, as you mentioned, or Morning Sun, which have some nice flavour connotations for the sources of energy a Pokémon uses (Morning Sun, for instance, is a far more exclusive technique than Synthesis and is connected with Pokémon like Espeon, Togetic and Volcarona, suggesting that Pokémon who use it are drawing on sunlight for energy in a far more abstract, ‘magical’ sense than Pokémon who use Synthesis). Aura Sphere is another, which implies a connection with some sort of ‘soul energy’ or whatever you want to call it.

Conversely, it’s the moves that are the most widely available that tend to bug me, because those are the ones that are most likely to belong to Pokémon who have no business using them. Everyone brings up Focus Punch, which is available to a couple of clearly armless Pokémon like Togekiss, but my personal favourite is Aerial Ace. Now, yes, I know Aerial Ace is supposed to be a reference to an old Japanese sword move, the ‘turning swallow cut,’ but 1. it’s a Flying-type attack, 2. the only Pokémon who learn it by levelling are bird Pokémon (and… er… Heracross… for some reason… although Heracross can actually fly), and 3. whether you imagine it requiring flight or not, it carries connotations of extreme speed. Aerial Ace is available to a number of Pokemon who blatantly cannot fly and, in some cases, weigh hundreds of kilograms, including Tyranitar, Ursaring, Tangrowth, Metagross, Nidoqueen (but not Nidoking, so clearly they thought it was particularly appropriate to Nidoqueen for some reason), Slaking (!), Aggron (!!?), Maractus, Groudon, Armaldo, Bouffalant, Stoutland, Registeel (but not Regirock or Regice, so again they must have thought that this was an especially good move for Registeel in particular), Crustle (?), Ferrothorn (?!) and, of all things, Slowbro (but, once again for reasons beyond my comprehension, not Slowking, so someone must have thought at some point “what can we give Slowbro to emphasise the differences between him and Slowking? Oh; I know, AERIAL ACE.”).

I am a fairly new reader, so sorry if you’ve already said something about this, but WHY is that every archeologist in the games (with the exception of Cynthia, she is awesome) a crazed looter. Is there something wrong with their system or collage classes, or what? Cofragius makes it a little better, but not enough.

Oh, it’s not Pokémon’s fault. It’s just what people expect archaeologists to be. Personally I blame Indiana Jones and Lara Croft. There is a wonderful piece of writing that’s been floating around for a few years, purporting to be a letter of rejection for Indiana Jones’ application for tenure at Marshall College.

Yes, here it is: http://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/back-from-yet-another-globetrotting-adventure-indiana-jones-checks-his-mail-and-discovers-that-his-bid-for-tenure-has-been-denied

It’s always an eye-opener when you have to explain to people what archaeologists actually do. Sensible characters like Cynthia and Lenora are a step in the right direction (although I must say, Cynthia’s outfit would not last long on a dig site).

White 2 Playthrough Journal, episode 1: Where the f@#k are we?

So, I’ve finally gotten around to playing White 2, in tandem with my best friend Jim, who’s playing Black 2. We have both studiously avoided any spoilers up until this point, and are meeting these games with fresh eyes. This entry, and those that will follow it, are the results of our experiences as we flail madly through the games, smiting all who stand in our way. So, without further ado…

Bright lights! Loud noises! Dragons! Protagonists striking their most badass poses! Starter Pokémon! Villains! Douchebag whom I assume is the rival! Eccentric scientist with a book! MORE DRAGONS! COBALION! TERRAKION! VIRIZION! DRAAAAGON!

…yeah, it’s the opening cutscene. Honestly I feel Pokémon’s opening cutscenes are not really as good as they have been or could be; I think they peaked in the second and third generations. The Diamond and Pearl one was, quite blatantly, “LOOK AT ME I’M 3D LOOKATMELOOKATME I AM USING THE DS’S GRAPHICAL CAPABILITIES TO A FAR GREATER EXTENT THAN THE GAME ITSELF EVER WILL,” while the Black and White one was totally cryptic and very difficult to understand until after completing the game, but did manage to give away what ought to have been one of the games’ more important twists (the fact that N is allied with Team Plasma). This is just a generic montage of stuff that’s clearly going to be important in the game, and I don’t know whether I even care. Moving right along.

We quickly rush through all the usual awkwardness of Professor Juniper meeting you and needing help to decide whether she’s looking at a boy or a girl. I, at Jim’s insistence, am a girl (apparently we need to see whether anything happens differently for a female player, and he thought of it first, the little bastard), which means that I am the illegitimate love child of Mickey Mouse and Princess Leia, and he is a kid who styles his hair after a bushel of wheat. Professor Juniper introduces us to our lifelong friend (I guess?), Hugh, an aggressive-looking spiky-haired fellow, and gives the traditional “Pokémon are wondrous creatures, journey, exploration, growth, battle, partnership, aren’t Pokémon great?” spiel, before promptly buggering off out of our lives. Her influence persists, though, since she immediately contacts our mother (for the purposes of this commentary I will assume we are brother and sister, not that it’s likely to matter) and tells her that we are to receive our first Pokémon. When mother dear asks us, we protest that we don’t want Pokémon, have no idea what a Pokédex is, and certainly have no wish to go on a journey to complete one, but our pleas are, of course, in vain – mother is a forceful woman, and pressures us into accepting Professor Juniper’s assignment. Our contact, Bianca (oh, lord, that Bianca?) is here already, and we need to find her! With an exaggerated, synchronised sigh, we leave the house and- wait, where the hell are we?

This… doesn’t look like Nuvema Town. Er… in fact, this doesn’t look like any city in Unova. How did we get here and what is going on? Juniper? Is this you? Have we been drugged? CURSE YOU, JUNIPER!

Before we can get over our disorientation, we meet our friend Hugh and his little sister. Hugh already has a Pokémon, and is excited that we’re getting ours because he’s sick of having no other trainers around to battle and needs a travelling companion he can trust. His sister comments that she hopes we’ll take good care of our Pokémon when we get them, to which Hugh just… sort of looks at her coldly, says “yeah…” and gets right back to what he was saying before. Oo…kaay… Upon further investigation, we quickly conclude that Hugh is a very strange and possibly dangerous boy. His mother, when questioned, expresses a hope that we’ll keep Hugh on the right path and stop him from getting trouble… since he’s… “the sort of person who lets his rage build up inside him.” His father, perhaps even more alarmingly, mentions that “his goal is…” and then just… sort of… trails off ominously. Uh… Hughie, dear… don’t take this the wrong way, but… has anyone ever told you that anger leads to hate, and hate leads to suffering? Just, um… just FYI.

With Hugh in tow, we explore the town and learn that we are in Aspertia City, a town somewhere out the ass end of nowhere in south-eastern Unova, a part of the region that wasn’t accessible two years ago in Black and White. Unlike every other starting location in the games’ history, Aspertia City boasts a fully-functional Pokémon Centre, a fairly large population, and a Pokémon Trainers’ School (though this latter building is presently closed). Jim and I eventually find Bianca, the klutzy lunatic rival character of Black and White, perched atop Aspertia City’s high observation platform. Bianca presses our starter Pokémon into our hands – for Jim, a Snivy named Ulfric, and for me, an Oshawott whom I name Jaime. She also thrusts a Pokédex at each of us, and gives one to Hugh for good measure, because the more expensive technology she hands out to random teenagers, the better. Hugh immediately challenges us to a battle with his egg-raised starter Pokémon (as you might imagine, Jim sees a Tepig and I see a Snivy). Once Hugh has been suitably trounced, he dashes off to begin his adventure while Bianca drags us down to the Pokémon Centre and gives us the standard lecture on what an awesome place it is, along with a gift of ten Pokéballs – previous games give you five, enough to fill out a party; Bianca is clearly either anxious to get this show on the road or extremely pessimistic about our capture skills. Possibly both. Mother, a dutiful sort, appears and hands us pairs of running shoes, while Hugh’s sister gives us our Town Maps, along with a spare for Hugh himself, when we find him. With all of that out of the way, all we need to do is learn how to catch Pokémon… from, of all people, Bianca, the most scatterbrained Pokémon trainer in recorded history (but at least she arguably knows what she’s doing, in contrast to the caffeinated octogenarian who teaches trainers the same skill in Viridian City)… and set off for the next town!

Only… it looks like we have another familiar face to groan at first.