One lunatic's love-hate relationship with the Pokémon franchise, and his addled musings on its rights, wrongs, ins and outs. Come one, come all, and indulge my delusions of grandeur as I inflict my opinions on anyone within shouting distance.
well, this is simply unacceptable; those flags are flying in direct defiance of my command. I’m gonna go beat these guys up.
I don’t suppose I can just… jump down here?
Continue reading “Pokémon Portugal Version: Still Red Though”Let’s move; we’ve got gyms to steal and titans to eat, or something.
Apparently we can chat with the various Academy teachers outside of class to learn more about them and get closer to them.
Ms. Raifort, the history teacher, responds in a weirdly sinister way to learning that I’m interested in the past, and I just want to say pre-emptively that if she’s going to try to recruit me to a cult, I am absolutely all in.
Continue reading “Pokémon Spain Version: About 700 nm”As promised, here’s all additional the Pokémon I’ve met in Paldea since my first post about Scarlet.
So, it’s sort of a grasshopper. Have we got a grasshopper already? I don’t think we do. That’s rather nice. It feels… kind of weirdly smooth and shiny, even in comparison to other Pokémon, almost like it’s made out of moulded plastic; I think the contrast of the metallic blue and off-white adds to that. Not sure whether that’s going anywhere.
Continue reading “Pokémon Spain Version: Pokédex Roundup”
Artazon seems nice. “Picturesque,” I think is the word. Flowers, a windmill, pretty little houses, sunflowers, and lots of weird sculptures created by the town’s gym leader, Brassius.
A tragedy in two parts.
Continue reading “Pokémon Spain Version: Even More Red”I went to school and now I have a bunch of characters and plot stuff to talk about – first among them, this chick.
Nemona introduces her simply as “La Primera” – “The First” – which is the kind of nickname you get when you’re so badass that no-one has to ask “the first what?” because everyone knows the answer is “the first and bestest Pokémon trainer in the region.” My impression is that La Primera is what we would be calling “the Champion” in any other Pokémon game – that is, the “final boss” of the gym challenge – but that’s not what she’s called here, because “Champion” means something different in Paldea. It’s not a position occupied by one trainer at a time, it’s a rank that many trainers can attain. Nemona is a Champion of Paldea, one of a few, and hopes that we can join her at that level, which means collecting gym badges and passing a Big Final Test. La Primera, presumably, is the one who administers that test.
Continue reading “Pokémon Spain Version: Redness Intensifies”It is on, as the saying goes, in a manner not dissimilar to classic 1981 Nintendo arcade game Donkey Kong
Here be spoil- oh, who am I kidding, you all played this game weeks ago; you don’t give a $#!t
Continue reading “Pokémon Spain Version: The Red One”Introduction/rules here.
okay, we’re gonna
we’re gonna do the thing, or we’re gonna try, anyway
Like I said last time, the test here is basically that I only have four Pokémon and I didn’t choose them, but I can play normally with those four. Parker, who doesn’t have Champion status, is mostly going to be a spectator, unfortunately – with the Death card in play, if he gets knocked out even once, he’s gone for the foreseeable future. Hell, if he even takes damage, I can’t heal him because of the High Priestess. My team is also heavily slanted towards Poison-types, which the first member of the Elite Four, Will, is set up very well to deal with, but hopefully our levels are now high enough that we can just kick the $#!t out of him and it won’t matter.
Well, no point in standing around; let’s give this a go.
Continue reading “Heart Gold Kingslocke: Episode 16”Introduction/rules here.
Last time, I was exploring the deeper caverns of Mount Mortar and had just drawn the Ten of Pentacles, which prompts Jim the Editor to pick a custom rule contributed by a commenter – and perhaps to make some other changes as well.
y’know what, you have to be a little bit insane to support me on Patreon; I don’t know what I expected; thanks, Name (Required)
So we’re losing the Six of Swords and adopting this… explosive rule, meaning our cards in play are now these ones:
Introduction/rules here.
I’m starting off this leg by just… putting a whole lot of Pokémon through basic training. Thanks to the King of Swords, all my lower-level Pokémon can ignore the rules and do whatever they want until they hit 31, and there are actually a lot who can evolve before that point.
Call it an investment in the future.
Continue reading “Heart Gold Kingslocke: Episode 14”Introduction/rules here.
Right. Now what?
Team Rocket’s defeated, so it’s time to set a course for the final gym in Blackthorn City – which means travelling along route 44 and drawing another card!
Continue reading “Heart Gold Kingslocke: Episode 13”
Pokémaniacal 