White 2 Playthrough Journal, episode 5: That’s Showbiz

Last time on Black and White 2, Jim and I had just managed a stunning defeat of Roxie, only to learn that we have apparently attracted the attention of some movers and shakers in the Unova film industry. A talent scout approaches us as we leave the Virbank Gym, and explains that Pokéstar Studios needs kids like us. Bemused, we follow him to the northern quarter of Virbank City, where the opulent palaces of Poké-Hollywood sprawl across vast tracts of land like great golden toads squatting on their lilypads, peering goggle-eyed at the hapless water insects swimming beneath them. There, we are introduced to the eccentric golden-haired master of this place – Stu Deeoh.

Get it? Stu Deeoh? Because he owns a studio? It’s a pun! Oh, Game Freak, you kill me.

It's difficult to show what the whole place looks like from a screenshot, so the anime's vision of Pokéstar Studios will have to do.

Stu conducts us to the great Pokéstar theatre to show us what he and his minions do in their palace of golden dreams. Their most recent release, in fact, happens to be the debut appearance of Roxie’s father, the erstwhile captain of the Virbank-Castelia ferry service: an action-packed blockbuster entitled Brycen-Man. The title character, to our immense shock, is played by none other than Brycen, the Icirrus City Gym Leader, returning to the silver screen after a long absence. His luridly-costumed supervillain is opposed by Pop Roxie’s character, the similarly embroidered Riolu Man, in an epic battle set in an amusement park full of innocent bystanders. Jim and I happily accept the complimentary tickets offered by Stu Deeoh, grab some popcorn, and settle in to watch the movie.

Afterwards, as we leave the theatre, Pop Roxie approaches us and nervously asks what we thought of his debut appearance. I enthusiastically launch into a glowing encomium of Brycen-Man, proclaiming the film a work of comedic genius, with particularly high praise for Pop Roxie’s hilarious portrayal of the film’s antagonist, Riolu Man, a bumbling, stuttering goof whose ill-advised attempts to thwart the brilliant and unbelievably handsome title character provide riotous laughs from beginning to end. Pop Roxie appears to be squirming and looking at his feet, no doubt from his modesty, so I tone it down a little and move into a discussion of the film’s clever inversion of the standard hero/villain paradigm that has us cheering for the title character even as he gleefully cuts a swathe of destruction through the innocent patrons of the amusement park.

At this point, Jim murmurs in my ear that we were supposed to be rooting for Riolu Man.

I pause in mid-sentence, my mouth hanging open. By the time I manage to close it, Pop Roxie has slunk away through the shadows, forlornly muttering something about not quitting his day job.

Well. Whoops.

Remember this dude? So, you might or might not have picked this up from Black and White, but he was totally a famous actor before becoming a Gym Leader, and now he's had a mid-life crisis and gone back to his old (ludicrously highly-paid) job.

Stu Deeoh soon tracks us down to ask how we would feel about joining the crew for his next cinematic masterpiece. Jim declares that he has better things to do and suggests we return to the Virbank Complex for some level grinding, but I am intrigued by Stu’s offer. If Brycen-Man is anything to go by, there’s clearly room in Pokéstar Studios for some exciting new talent – and who better than I? Anyone can see, just to look at me, that I was born to be in the movies – perhaps in a sci-fi epic featuring a great interstellar empire and a reclusive order of mystical knights. With visions of my future career all but materialising in front of me, I follow Stu Dio to his studeeoh to begin work on our first great project: a remake of Brycen-Man. Apparently the movie was just such an appalling flop at the box office that Brycen is demanding we burn the film, eradicate all evidence of it, shoot the director, and start from scratch. I protest that remaking a work of cinematic genius like Brycen-Man would be nothing short of sacrilege, but change my tune soon enough when I see the rewritten script, in which I have been cast as the spunky young heroine, Riolu Girl. I stride onto the soundstage, take possession of the rental Pokémon who has been cast as my partner, and begin filming opposite Brycen. Within a few short days, we have repurposed all of the original props and sets for Brycen-Man into a new blockbuster that brings both renown and profits to Pokéstar in spades… and so begins my movie career.

Everything I touch turns to gold. Every director I work with proclaims my acting flawless, my interpretation of their characters genius, my delivery of key lines nothing short of divine. I star in such acclaimed masterpieces as the Timegate Traveller trilogy, Mystery Doors of the Magical Land, and Red Fog of Terror, performing immaculately choreographed Pokémon battles alongside actors like Brycen and the mesmerising Kanto psychic, Sabrina, as well as some of the most highly trained Pokémon in showbusiness and a crew of the finest performance capture actors and CG artists in the industry. My renown grows, and soon I am surrounded by fans, day and night, attempting to curry my favour with extravagant gifts. I develop a crippling Rare Candy habit, and eat mainly poffins imported from Sinnoh at tremendous cost. I take up Tai Chi to keep myself in shape, but quickly decide that it is too much work and hire someone else to take up Tai Chi for me. One day, in one of my more lucid moods, I track down Stu Deeoh and ask him when I can expect to get paid for my work.

“Oh, dah-ling, we do not pay you! That is so, ‘ow do you say, last season! You are workink for us for ze sheer joy of your aaaht, are you not?”

Pokéstar's costume designers are very well looked-after, and kept fully supplied with all the food, conveniences, entertainment and LSD they could ask for.

In fact, it turns out I actually owe Pokéstar a tremendous sum of money for the expensive food, clothing and massage treatments I’ve been purchasing through the company account on a daily basis. This sum is known exactly to only a few of Stu Deeoh’s most trusted financial advisors, but is rumoured to exceed the GDP of Botswana. Naturally, I do the honourable thing and book a ticket on the first ferry to Castelia City, instructing my Growlithe, Barristan, to set the company records office on fire as we leave.

Pokéstar Studios is an… interesting addition to the game. As my experiences prove, it is exceptionally silly, but I have come to feel that it actually serves a legitimate and quite interesting purpose. In concept it is reminiscent of Pokémon Contests and Musicals, in that your goal is to leverage your Pokémon’s ‘star power,’ as it were, but in practice it is strikingly different, since its central mechanic is essentially that of a choreographed Pokémon battle. You are given a rental Pokémon and asked to fight one or more Pokémon belonging to another actor – but your aim is not simply to win, but to win in a particular fashion that suits the needs of the script. Since you have a copy of the script, this is not especially challenging for an experienced player, even if the stage directions are often a little cryptic. For a new player, however… well, obviously I don’t have the perspective required to evaluate it on those terms, but I think these scripted battles are actually a fantastic way to introduce new players to a wide variety of obscure moves and their effects. The option to use your own Pokémon in place of rental Pokémon to shoot a film also puts a neat ‘puzzle-solving’ twist on the traditional Pokémon battle – the script has certain needs, and you have to prepare a Pokémon capable of fulfilling them. Actually, I think the whole thing might have been more effective if it didn’t give the option of using a rental Pokémon after the initial screening of Brycen-Man and forced players to evaluate the requirements of the script for themselves, starting from very basic Pokémon and moves that can be obtained in and around Virbank City – but perhaps that would be too overwhelming for an inexperienced player? In any case, frivolous though it may be, seen in the right light Pokéstar Studios is a great little diversion that puts a fascinating new spin on the central mechanic of the Pokémon games. It also takes the unprecedented step of having your Pokémon battle against things that aren’t Pokémon. Since most of Pokéstar’s movies use ridiculous amounts of computer animation, during filming these props are always seen as square slabs of green metal with icons on the front, though you can see the machines and monsters they represent when you watch the completed films. They act as Pokémon in all respects, but have whatever stats, moves, abilities and elemental properties are demanded by the script. This strikes me as a fascinating little ‘proof of concept,’ showing that the games can very effectively stage battles between Pokémon and objects to serve the needs of a plot. I anticipate seeing more of this – in a less theatrical context – in future games.

Next time, I’ll be making a break for the ferry terminal… just as soon as I can find Jim.

White 2 Playthrough Journal, episode 4: Sex, Drugs and Pokémon

Official Nintendo art of Roxie. Something in this design makes me feel like she should be a Bug-type specialist. Is that just me? I suppose her signature Pokémon *is* Whirlipede... At last permitted to leave Aspertia City and Floccesy Town behind us, Jim and I head for Virbank City. Outside Floccesy Town, Cheren accosts us briefly to explain the significance of dark grass, something we remember perfectly well from Black and White, thank you very much. I decide to muck around in the area for a while to see if any new Pokémon will appear here that we haven’t seen elsewhere on the route, and I am rewarded with a Venipede. I add the spiky little bastard to my party, naming him Tyrion, and hang around to train him up a little. Jim, meanwhile, heads east into Virbank City, and fields a call from our Dear Mother. One of the other contacts available on our XTranceivers, Mother possesses an encyclopaedic knowledge of the Unova region and can tell us anything we might need to know about any area we visit. We prefer to avoid Mother because she is a controlling bitch queen, but she has decided to call us this time, since we simply must know about the Virbank Complex, an industrial sector in the south of the city which is, for no goodly reason, infested with wild Pokémon. The words ‘infested with wild Pokémon’ pique Jim’s interest, and he veers south to check the place out. On the way, he takes a moment to eavesdrop on a domestic disturbance between two of the locals. The captain who runs the ferry service to Castelia City is no longer fulfilling his duties, because he… has decided he would rather be a movie star. Yes. Well. Fair enough, I suppose, but it leaves us trapped in Virbank City. Well, we have Pokémon; we should be able to hijack a ship easily enough. Of course, there are other, far less important, people who are also trapped in Virbank City, and it is on their behalf that the captain’s loud, angry daughter is taking him to task. His daughter’s name is Roxie, and he has apparently been inspired by her – after all, she’s always managed to balance her passion for rock music with her responsibilities as a Gym Leader, so-

Wait, what?

Okay, all right. The punk chick is the Gym Leader. We can work with this.

I catch up with Jim as he tails Roxie to a small, dingy building in the middle of Virbank City. I open the door, revealing a dilapidated, poorly lit stairwell, and immediately stagger as I am hit by the stench of dried vomit. The faint sound of music wafts up from the basement. We have apparently followed Roxie to a seedy nightclub. Jim points out the Unova League insignia in flickering pink neon over the entrance, and the sign by the door which reads ‘Virbank City Pokémon Gym. Leader: Roxie. Poison days, poison on the stage!’ Poison in the air too, I think to myself, peering at the unidentifiable stains on the concrete floor. I shake my head firmly and hold up both of my palms in protest. Jim looks at me accusingly and points down the stairs. I hold my nose and continue shaking my head. Jim rolls his eyes, grabs me by the collar and drags me off to the Virbank Complex for some training.

The Virbank complex. Screenshot stolen from Serebii.net.

The Virbank Complex seems to be an oil refinery, filled with tanks, distillation towers, and smokestacks. Naturally the game puts on its ‘educational’ hat at this point by introducing a scientist who wanders around the complex muttering explanations to himself about how all the different pieces of equipment work, and running away if anyone overhears him. As profoundly strange as this man is, I have to applaud the effort. I really do like it when Pokémon tries to do this sort of thing, just because I like entertainment to be educational on principle (if you’re clever, you can trick the kids into learning stuff without even realising it) but it’s not exactly subtle; it feels rather ‘pasted on.’ The Slateport Oceanic Museum in Ruby and Sapphire made a bit more sense, if only because oceanography is actually relevant to the plot of those games, and the Oreburgh coal mine in Diamond and Pearl was at least trying to integrate things into the game by using Pokémon workers. Anyway, in blatant defiance of any pollution the place might be pumping out, the Virbank Complex is overgrown with tall grass and teeming with many different species of wild Pokémon – offering us a perfect opportunity to beat some Pokémon up for their sweet, precious XPs. Most of our Pokémon evolve as we train here; first Sansa and Elisif become a pair of adorable Flaafy, then Jaime evolves into a feisty Dewott and Ulfric into a cunning Servine. Finally, almost unthinkably, Jim’s Riolu, Dovahkiin, evolves at a shockingly low level into a noble Lucario. We both decide to pick up Fire Pokémon while we’re here – Jim catches a Magby and names him Falk, while I find a Growlithe. Ruminating on names, I briefly consider Tywin, but reflect that my party is fast turning into Team Lannister, and settle instead on Barristan (I receive immediate confirmation that I chose correctly when my Growlithe’s nature turns out to be Bold). Suitably prepared for battle, we return to the filthy dive in which Roxie has chosen to make her Gym.

I stagger down the stairs holding my nose as Jim walks ahead trying to pretend he doesn’t know me. We come to the basement and enter what appears to be a studio owned by Roxie’s band. Roxie herself is up on the stage, eyes screwed shut, caressing her electric guitar, accompanied by a second guitarist and a drummer. I am forced to take my hand away from my nose to plug my ears as Jim clambers onto the stage to challenge Roxie, who is totally oblivious to the world outside her guitar. Jim looks down at me, shrugs, and goes to talk to her marginally more aware backup musicians. While he tries to get their attention, I haul myself onto the stage and, unable to take any more, push aside Roxie’s long white hair and scream in her ear, as loud as I can manage,

The Virbank Gym. Screenshot stolen from Bulbapedia.

“YOUR MUSIC SUCKS!”

That gets her attention.

Tyrion, luckily, is quite as annoyed as I am. With the classic Defence Curl/Rollout combo, he manages within a few turns to build up enough force to smash Roxie’s Koffing. Now several turns into his Rollout, there’s no question of Roxie being able to do anything about him, and her poor Whirlipede is made to suffer the indignity of a one-shot knock-out from one of its own lesser cousins. Roxie indignantly throws a Toxic Badge at me and tells me to get the hell out of her Gym, before healing her Pokémon for the next challenger. Of course, with Dovahkiin now a Steel-type and therefore immune to all of Roxie’s most powerful Poison techniques, Jim’s challenge is quite as much a walkover as mine was, and we leave Roxie a broken wreck, sobbing over her guitar as her backup musicians give us dirty looks.

A man with brilliant yellow hair tails us as we leave, apparently anxious to speak to us. He is somewhat taken aback when I collapse, gasping for breath, on the street the moment we leave the noxious Gym, but to his credit presses on, telling us about the exciting new opportunity he wants to offer us at Pokéstar Studios in the north of Virbank City…

White 2 Playthrough Journal, episode 3: Graduation Day

Official Nintendo art of Cheren. Er... is it just me, or has he gotten really pale and skinny since the last games? Jim and I head back to Aspertia Town, eager to check out the first gym of our new quest. We are delayed on the way by Alder, who leaps off a cliff again to prove that he hasn’t become any less manly since we last saw him. Alder has a precious gift for us, something that will make us even more unbelievably powerful than we are already: a handful of Oran Berries. We stare at him in disbelief for a moment, then throw the berries in his face and run for it.

In Aspertia City, we quickly learn that the new Pokémon Gym is actually an extension of the Trainer’s School we saw earlier. The interior of the building contains the School itself, which boasts all the usual books and blackboard diagrams explaining things like status ailments and type matchups, complete with a couple of intense-looking students trying to memorise everything. Out in the backyard is the Gym – a fairly plain dirt field with a couple of battle areas marked out in white. The Gym Leader is none other than Cheren, the other rival character of Black and White. Cheren is an uptight, bossy fellow who is nonetheless very clever, hardworking and loyal. He’s also a great deal more powerful than either of us have any right to be at this point. We shrug and decide to go for it anyway. Cheren orders his minions to assume their positions, before taking his own place on a platform at the back of the arena. This place turns out to be a tremendously unimaginative Normal Pokémon Gym. Both of Cheren’s trainers boast one Lillipup and one Patrat each, and fare poorly against our now quite well-trained Pokémon. Cheren himself is just as uninteresting (and appears surprisingly sweaty) – he turns out to have only a Patrat and a Lillipup himself, although much higher in level and spiced up a little with his signature move, Work Up. He complains later that he’s having trouble getting used to battling without his regular partners; I guess he’s supposed to tone it down for us noobs. Sansa manages to defeat both of them quite soundly by paralysing them with Thunder Wave, while Jim has been level grinding with Dovahkiin so obsessively that the little guy now knows Force Palm, a move Cheren’s Pokémon are utterly unequipped to deal with. Cheren muses that he’s glad his first ever challengers were so impressive, and hands over a pair of Basic Badges (the same badge formerly given out by Lenora in Nacrene City), along with the TM for Work Up.

This Gym is meh.

The Aspertia Gym. Screenshot ganked from Bulbapedia.

The first Gym of a game usually is, I grant you. Unlike most other Pokémon Gyms, which normally sport gimmicks or puzzles to work around as you fight your way to the Gym Leader, the first one typically features only a winding path that may or may not allow you to bypass the other trainers and head straight for the leader (Brock, Roxanne and Roark’s Gyms allow this; Falkner’s does not). The first Gym of Black and White, the Striaton Gym, went the extra mile to change that with its triplet Leaders, who took on challengers with a Pokémon that had an advantage against the player’s starter. Now, I certainly think this could have been done better, but I really loved the concept as a basic introduction to the type system by new players; if nothing else it really hammered home the importance of the Grass/Water/Fire relationship and encouraged players to use it to their advantage rather than simply blundering in with the strongest Pokémon available. Cheren’s Aspertia Gym doesn’t do any of that, which is especially ironic given that it’s based in the backyard of a school for Pokémon trainers. I don’t mean to suggest that the Aspertia Gym should have tried to replicate the lessons of the Striaton Gym, because it should be clear that it would just feel forced and artificial for anyone who’d played Black and White. It would make more sense, since the Trainer’s School has just been teaching us about status conditions and battle items, to have players fight Pokémon that emphasise one or both of those themes. It might be effective, for instance, to give players some firsthand experience with the different status conditions by including one trainer who uses paralysis, one who uses poison, and one who relies on sleep, before giving Cheren a selection of Pokémon that employ all three. Anyway, that’s enough soapbox time for me; back to the story.

Remember how awesome these Pokémon are? Neither do I!

As we leave the building, Jim and I are once again accosted by Bianca, who, delighted by our progress, presses upon us the TM for Return and a pair of C-Gears, the godawful devices that permanently occupy the lower screen of the DS and facilitate the multiplayer functions of Black and White 2. Cheren emerges from the school and greets Bianca, whom he apparently hasn’t seen since the events of Black and White, almost two years ago. He doesn’t even have her XTransceiver number, which provides the opportunity for everyone to swap contact details. Jim and I are thus introduced to the people we can contact for help on the XTransceiver (a wrist-mounted video-phone capable of managing up to four-way calls) and the types of assistance they can offer. Bianca can check the strength of your friendship with each of your Pokémon, any time and any place. Cheren can list the weaknesses of any Pokémon in your party, or explain the effects of your Pokémon’s abilities (including a few details that aren’t included in the ability description, like Magma Armour’s secondary effect of making eggs hatch more quickly). Professor Juniper, of course, can check your Pokédex and will give you hints about catching more Pokémon, but she can also tell you how to evolve any Pokémon in your party. She even knows the really obscure ones; I later tested her on Eevee and she listed all seven methods. While these are clearly useful features, I have mixed feelings about them. They greatly diminish the amount of important information the game hides from you, stuff you need to know but probably won’t find without looking up a walkthrough on the internet. Goodness knows I would have loved Professor Juniper’s help when I was mucking around on Sapphire version trying to evolve my Feebas. On the other hand, they put all of that information right there, just for the asking, so that there’s no longer any interest in playing around with the game to try and find it for yourself. I suppose what I’m asking for is a middle ground, where the game will tell you how all the weird evolutions go, but only if you work for it. Of course, perhaps this way of doing things simply recognises that most players in this day and age will just look it up on Bulbapedia or what have you.

Once all this is done, Hugh arrives to challenge Cheren to a Gym battle, right there on the street. Cheren indicates that he’d be happy to have another battle, but he needs a moment to prepare, and asks Hugh to follow him into the school. When Cheren leaves, Hugh explodes with indignation at being put off, and proclaims Cheren ‘weak’ before storming into the school after him. I… am beginning to think that every entry of this playthrough journal is going to include at least one hint that Hugh is a dangerous psychopath. Jim firmly declares that he is not our problem, and we turn to leave Aspertia City for our next destination: the second Unova League Gym in nearby Virbank City.

White 2 Playthrough Journal, episode 2: Achievement Unlocked!

Our protagonists, ladies and gentlemen! That's me on the right and Jim on the left. I'm not usually a chick; I just play one on TV. Official art is copyright of Nintendo. Where we last left our intrepid heroes, Princess Leia and the Cornfield Kid, they had just left their home of Aspertia City and were marching boldly towards nearby Floccesy Town in hopes of finding Hugh, ‘cause if that kid’s left alone for too long I ain’t being held responsible for whatever happens. On the outskirts of Floccesy Town, however, we encounter… oh, good lord; it’s Alder. Alder, famous in Black and White as Unova’s Champion, is an exuberant giant of a man with flaming red hair, pecs of steel, and a poncho that makes him look like he belongs in a Peruvian folk band. He has a disturbing habit of jumping off cliffs in order to get to the ground faster, which he demonstrates now, leaping from on high to land smack in our path as we attempt to enter Floccesy Town. Alder proclaims that he is going to train us, and marches purposefully into Floccesy Town. We follow, hoping for some sage advice like “one strategy is to use Pokémon that you capture in your party!” (that is a legit quote from the official strategy guide, by the way). When we reach Alder’s house, however, it turns out that he has changed his mind. He isn’t going to train us, because we already have something we’re supposed to be doing – finding Hugh and delivering our spare Town Map. This is, admittedly, important. After all, if Hugh gets lost and starts to feel confused and alone, he could…

…anyway. Alder sends us on our way, and we wander off to the east of Floccesy Town to see what we can find. Here we meet a few trainers, who give us sage advice like ‘if you make eye contact with a trainer, you have to battle!’ and tell us how amazed we’re going to be by their Patrat (undoubtedly, it is in the top percentage of all Patrat). We encounter a typical Pokémon-style roadblock in the form of a Hiker who won’t let anyone without a Gym Badge pass, and, unimpressed, turn north to Floccesy Ranch. Here we finally track down Hugh, raring for a couple of practice battles; Jaime and Ulfric stomp him quickly enough. At this point the owners of the ranch, a husband and wife team, wander past and greet us, casually asking whether we happen to have seen a Herdier, since they have two who normally stick together, but can’t find the second one at the moment. Not to worry, it’ll surely turn up… right Hugh?

Uh… Hugh?

This is Hugh, who may be a sociopath. He is our best friend! I would trust him with my life!

Hugh is glaring at the owners with utter vitriol, fists clenched, a vein popping on his reddening brow. He demands to know how they can possibly be so nonchalant and storms off to find Herdier and make sure it hasn’t been killed or eaten or whatever. Jim and I look at each other and shrug as Hugh’s muffled obscenities fade into the distance. We split up to determine what Pokémon can be found at Floccesy Ranch. Jim almost immediately finds a Riolu, the juvenile form of his favourite Pokémon, which he captures and names Dovahkiin. We quickly determine (unsurprisingly) that Riolu is very rare here, and chalk this up to Destiny. He and I both capture Mareep as well, out of sheer Gold and Silver nostalgia, naming them Elisif and Sansa, respectively. We continue to hunt, and reflect on the number of Pokémon species we’ve found so far. Almost from the get-go, Black and White 2 have been offering us a great deal more variety than their predecessors, with Pidove, Sewaddle and Sunkern appearing on the road out of Floccesy Town in addition to the more standard Patrat and Purrloin, but Floccesy Ranch is making things very interesting indeed. We soon identify Azurill and Lillipup in addition to the Mareep, Riolu, Patrat and Pidove we’ve already noted, and later find a few Psyduck as well. If this keeps up, it’s going to make Black and White 2 much more enjoyable to replay than the previous games, which offered a grand total of five species before the first Gym battle, counting the starter (Patrat, Lillipup, Purrloin, and one of the elemental monkeys). We applaud this change, and move on. While Jim hangs around level-grinding, I wander off to find Hugh, who is searching the ranch for the missing Herdier. I decide to humour him and help look. We eventually manage to track down the sheepdog Pokémon by the sound of its barks. When Hugh realises its voice is coming from just around the corner, he dashes off to find the owner… leaving me to deal with the black-clad ginger fellow who seems to have abducted Herdier. The villain introduces himself as a member of Team Plasma, the organisation that attempted to conquer Unova two years ago. He proclaims his annoyance at being interrupted in the middle of his mission, and prepares to deal with me using his most ruthless methods: he throws a TM at me and runs away, leaving Herdier behind.

Uh… okay?

I mean… if that’s how Team Plasma handles its opponents these days… by throwing useful items at them and then legging it… well, then, honestly I’m totally fine with it. I hope one of them has a Master Ball.

This is Alder. He jumps off cliffs and we hate him. Not necessarily in that order.

Hugh drags the owner over to see Herdier, screams at him again for not being more concerned, and leaves in a huff. What can I say? Kid’s got issues. Jim and I stick around a little longer to train before heading back to Floccesy Town to consult Alder and see if he’s ready to teach us yet. Alder, for his part, seems keen to keep jerking us along. He comments in surprise that we’ve already grown a great deal in the time we’ve been away, and now he would like us to help him teach someone else! We mutter darkly that the time we’ve been away amounts to more than two thirds of the time we’ve been trainers, but grudgingly follow him into his house to indulge in practice battles with two young trainers and their elemental monkey Pokémon. This little episode seems intended to replace the Striaton Gym sequence of Black and White, which teaches new players how to make use of (and avoid falling foul of) the type chart. Alder first has you fight the monkey who is weakest against your starter Pokémon (in my case, Pansear), and then the one who is strongest (Pansage), similarly to how the Striaton Gym pits you against a Gym Leader with a type advantage, but gives you the monkey capable of defeating him. Honestly, I think the Striaton Gym’s method was clearer and more instructive, though the point was somewhat hamstrung by the very limited variety of Pokémon available, which forced the lesser Gym trainers to use Lillipup rather than actual Grass-, Water- or Fire-types. Alder’s way of doing it is neat enough, though I fear it may not be explicit or forceful enough for anyone who doesn’t already understand the system.

Alder explains to us that a new Pokémon Gym has just been opened in our hometown of Aspertia City, and suggests that we return there to check it out. This will be the subject of my next entry, though there’s one more thing to talk about today: achievements! Pokémon now has an achievement system, which is introduced to us by a very peculiar and rather pushy fellow known only as Mr. Medal as we leave Alder’s home. He hands us Medal Boxes containing a bunch of silvery disks stamped with question marks. These are ‘hint medals,’ and contain somewhat vague hints at things we can do to earn the actual medals that will replace them, like ‘catch a lot of Pokémon,’ ‘save often,’ ‘visit Pokémon centres,’ and so on. Mr. Medal has people stalking us to keep track of when we earn our medals, and will track us down at Pokémon Centres whenever he needs to deliver one. Many video games (perhaps even most, these days?) have similar systems, and although receiving medals for catching 5 Pokémon or using not-very-effective moves 10 times or whatever is a bit groan-inducing for experienced trainers, I actually think it’s quite a nice way of encouraging new players to explore everything they can do with the games and ‘learn the ropes’ as it were. It’s reasonably unobtrusive and doesn’t slow the game down much, so it’s not as if it’s getting in the way of anything, and I’m fairly happy with it.

Anyway, that’s all for now – see you next time, when we challenge the newly-minted Aspertia Gym!

White 2 Playthrough Journal, episode 1: Where the f@#k are we?

So, I’ve finally gotten around to playing White 2, in tandem with my best friend Jim, who’s playing Black 2. We have both studiously avoided any spoilers up until this point, and are meeting these games with fresh eyes. This entry, and those that will follow it, are the results of our experiences as we flail madly through the games, smiting all who stand in our way. So, without further ado…

Bright lights! Loud noises! Dragons! Protagonists striking their most badass poses! Starter Pokémon! Villains! Douchebag whom I assume is the rival! Eccentric scientist with a book! MORE DRAGONS! COBALION! TERRAKION! VIRIZION! DRAAAAGON!

…yeah, it’s the opening cutscene. Honestly I feel Pokémon’s opening cutscenes are not really as good as they have been or could be; I think they peaked in the second and third generations. The Diamond and Pearl one was, quite blatantly, “LOOK AT ME I’M 3D LOOKATMELOOKATME I AM USING THE DS’S GRAPHICAL CAPABILITIES TO A FAR GREATER EXTENT THAN THE GAME ITSELF EVER WILL,” while the Black and White one was totally cryptic and very difficult to understand until after completing the game, but did manage to give away what ought to have been one of the games’ more important twists (the fact that N is allied with Team Plasma). This is just a generic montage of stuff that’s clearly going to be important in the game, and I don’t know whether I even care. Moving right along.

We quickly rush through all the usual awkwardness of Professor Juniper meeting you and needing help to decide whether she’s looking at a boy or a girl. I, at Jim’s insistence, am a girl (apparently we need to see whether anything happens differently for a female player, and he thought of it first, the little bastard), which means that I am the illegitimate love child of Mickey Mouse and Princess Leia, and he is a kid who styles his hair after a bushel of wheat. Professor Juniper introduces us to our lifelong friend (I guess?), Hugh, an aggressive-looking spiky-haired fellow, and gives the traditional “Pokémon are wondrous creatures, journey, exploration, growth, battle, partnership, aren’t Pokémon great?” spiel, before promptly buggering off out of our lives. Her influence persists, though, since she immediately contacts our mother (for the purposes of this commentary I will assume we are brother and sister, not that it’s likely to matter) and tells her that we are to receive our first Pokémon. When mother dear asks us, we protest that we don’t want Pokémon, have no idea what a Pokédex is, and certainly have no wish to go on a journey to complete one, but our pleas are, of course, in vain – mother is a forceful woman, and pressures us into accepting Professor Juniper’s assignment. Our contact, Bianca (oh, lord, that Bianca?) is here already, and we need to find her! With an exaggerated, synchronised sigh, we leave the house and- wait, where the hell are we?

This… doesn’t look like Nuvema Town. Er… in fact, this doesn’t look like any city in Unova. How did we get here and what is going on? Juniper? Is this you? Have we been drugged? CURSE YOU, JUNIPER!

Before we can get over our disorientation, we meet our friend Hugh and his little sister. Hugh already has a Pokémon, and is excited that we’re getting ours because he’s sick of having no other trainers around to battle and needs a travelling companion he can trust. His sister comments that she hopes we’ll take good care of our Pokémon when we get them, to which Hugh just… sort of looks at her coldly, says “yeah…” and gets right back to what he was saying before. Oo…kaay… Upon further investigation, we quickly conclude that Hugh is a very strange and possibly dangerous boy. His mother, when questioned, expresses a hope that we’ll keep Hugh on the right path and stop him from getting trouble… since he’s… “the sort of person who lets his rage build up inside him.” His father, perhaps even more alarmingly, mentions that “his goal is…” and then just… sort of… trails off ominously. Uh… Hughie, dear… don’t take this the wrong way, but… has anyone ever told you that anger leads to hate, and hate leads to suffering? Just, um… just FYI.

With Hugh in tow, we explore the town and learn that we are in Aspertia City, a town somewhere out the ass end of nowhere in south-eastern Unova, a part of the region that wasn’t accessible two years ago in Black and White. Unlike every other starting location in the games’ history, Aspertia City boasts a fully-functional Pokémon Centre, a fairly large population, and a Pokémon Trainers’ School (though this latter building is presently closed). Jim and I eventually find Bianca, the klutzy lunatic rival character of Black and White, perched atop Aspertia City’s high observation platform. Bianca presses our starter Pokémon into our hands – for Jim, a Snivy named Ulfric, and for me, an Oshawott whom I name Jaime. She also thrusts a Pokédex at each of us, and gives one to Hugh for good measure, because the more expensive technology she hands out to random teenagers, the better. Hugh immediately challenges us to a battle with his egg-raised starter Pokémon (as you might imagine, Jim sees a Tepig and I see a Snivy). Once Hugh has been suitably trounced, he dashes off to begin his adventure while Bianca drags us down to the Pokémon Centre and gives us the standard lecture on what an awesome place it is, along with a gift of ten Pokéballs – previous games give you five, enough to fill out a party; Bianca is clearly either anxious to get this show on the road or extremely pessimistic about our capture skills. Possibly both. Mother, a dutiful sort, appears and hands us pairs of running shoes, while Hugh’s sister gives us our Town Maps, along with a spare for Hugh himself, when we find him. With all of that out of the way, all we need to do is learn how to catch Pokémon… from, of all people, Bianca, the most scatterbrained Pokémon trainer in recorded history (but at least she arguably knows what she’s doing, in contrast to the caffeinated octogenarian who teaches trainers the same skill in Viridian City)… and set off for the next town!

Only… it looks like we have another familiar face to groan at first.