Six Pokémon all at once!? What could be happening? Well, just sit still for a minute and allow me to introduce you to the three elemental monkeys of Black and White. I’ve decided to do these Pokémon as a group, for three reasons: first, they’re strongly associated as a group, second, my major grievances against them are shared by the whole trio, and third, they’re just so unforgivably bland I don’t think I could possibly come up with enough material if I took on each one separately. So, without further ado: the elemental monkey Pokémon!
I appreciate the thought behind these Pokémon; I really do. For a bit of context, let’s all think back to Red and Blue. A big chunk of a Pokémon game’s storyline is, and always has been, travelling the countryside to obtain shiny bits of metal from trainers who have far more self esteem than you do in order to make yourself feel better about the fact that you are, in essence, an extremely violent prepubescent hobo. Continue reading “Pansage, Pansear, Panpour, Simisage, Simisear and Simipour”
Does everyone remember Dumbo? Y’know; the Disney movie about the baby elephant who could fly by flapping his stupidly large ears? Remember that one scene where he gets wasted and hallucinates about a parade of pink elephants?
In the interests of having a bit of experience with the Pokémon I’m talking about before jumping into them, I’ve decided not to go through them in order but start with the ones I’ve used already, starting with the first new Pokémon I caught: Purrloin.
…and where else to start but with my very own starter Pokémon? Before the English versions of Black and White were released, Snivy was given the fan nickname “Smugleaf,” and you can see why. My gods, he looks pleased with himself, doesn’t he? Honestly, I think Smugleaf would have been a better name than Snivy as it fits with the impression of haughtiness that Nintendo seems to have been aiming for with this entire evolutionary line, but it was not to be. Ah well. It certainly works anyway, in my opinion (except that the name “Servine” is a little unfortunate – it makes me think “servile,” when he is anything but). All three of these Pokémon clearly think not only that they’re smarter than you, but also stronger, more important and infinitely more handsome. You will want to strangle them within about five minutes. 
Pokémaniacal 