Squidward Tentacles asks:

I Could no longer….

Anyways, how do you think gamefreak would approach restoring Kyurem to the original Dragon?

My idea would be (as true to the seemingly benevolent natures of the protagonist in the games). Reshiram and Zekrom giving a piece of their essence, which would then be transformed into a mega stone for Kyurem

Well I am not Game Freak, as I have learned over the course of the last seven years, slowly, painfully and at great material and mystical cost. What we actually know about any plans Game Freak may ever have had to release this Pokémon (let’s call it “Primal Kyurem” for the sake of argument – I think Primal Reversion is arguably a better analogy for what we’re doing than Mega Evolution) is that there is an unobtainable item lingering in the code of all the games from Black and White onwards, called the God Stone. Aside from its grey colour, it looks exactly like the Light Stone and Dark Stone, the dormant forms of Reshiram and Zekrom, which are plot-critical items in the final versions of Black and White. Not enough information is left in the finished games for us to deduce what the God Stone was intended to be for. It might have been meant as a dormant form of Kyurem, but the name “God Stone” seems altogether too grand for a being as diminished and broken as Kyurem. I suspect it is the item, created by somehow merging the Light and Dark Stones, that would be absorbed by Kyurem (as it absorbs the Light Stone or Dark Stone at the climax of Black or White 2) to restore it to its “primal” state. But even if this is true, the notion was probably abandoned at a relatively early stage of the games’ development cycle. Continue reading “Squidward Tentacles asks:” →

Robin asks:

What are some of your least favourite Pokémon, and for what reasons?

This is the sort of question that gets me into trouble.

I… try to muster a semblance of objectivity when I write reviews; of course I do, and of course that is impossible, and of course personal aesthetic sensibilities colour everything I’ve ever written, because if they didn’t, then it wouldn’t be me writing, and what would even be the point? But there’s a couple of Pokémon that I have… issues with. Issues which, I will hasten to point out, are personal and strange and in general offensive to people who actually like those Pokémon, but that does seem to be what you’re asking for. So. Continue reading “Robin asks:” →

Elchar asks:

Wait so we can just asking you about your thoughts on random Pokémon? I think you have just set a dangerous precedent for yourself. Anyway. My favorite Pokémon ever are Voltorb and Electrode actually. What are your thoughts on them and their battle power? And if Electrode could get Mega evolution, how would you set its stats, types and abilities? Thanks.

Ehhhhhhh… yeee-es? In principle, sort of. I try not to make a habit of it, because it has in the past led to an inbox piled high with more “ooh, talk about my favourite next!” than I can deal with. I prefer to prioritise more specific questions, and I don’t particularly enjoy coming up with design ideas for mega evolutions, because to do a good one requires thinking at right angles to a Pokémon’s base design in a way that I’m not terribly good at. Having said all that, you did ask, so… Continue reading “Elchar asks:” →

Ty asks:

What are your thoughts on Mr. Mime? He was always an odd Pokemon that most kids thought were weird back when Gen I was the only Gen, at least as much as I remember. Do you think that persists? Is there a reason why Mr. Mimes can be both male and female when Jynxes are only female? Would you say the addition of Fairy-type helped or hurt Mr. Mime thematically? Is there anything you would do, if you could, to empower Mr. Mime competitively?

…hmm?

What?

A- a question!?

A question! A real proper question that isn’t from an obnoxious cartoon squid! Get our whole research team on it, right this-

What do you mean that’s just me!? Well, get the front-of-house staff on it, stoke the forge, advance our king’s bishop to C4, set up snipers on the roof, and someone take this guest’s coat! Continue reading “Ty asks:” →

Squidward Tentacles asks:

I’d tell you a random fact about fish, but I work with them every day. I hate them. I hate working at the Krusty Krab. I hate the nautical nonsense of a ninny that flips burgers right behind me every day.

Good day sir! I SAID good day!

Mmm. I sympathise. Unfortunately fish are often very stupid, and sponges, I’ve heard, are worse (though strangely proficient in fine dining and breathing). Crabs, however, are the highest form of life in the universe, as demonstrated by the fact that evolution keeps trying to turn other animals into crabs, and you should feel honoured to work for one. If you need something to take your mind off your coworker’s ceaseless blithering, try Jim the Editor’s randomised Kingslocke playthrough of Fire Red, now returning after an unfortunate but necessary hiatus to focus on work – or try out the rules yourself, and let me know how it goes!

Anonymous asks:

This doesn’t have anything to do with pokemon, but I was wondering if you might have any thoughts with your Archaeology background: In a lot of stuff written about Greco-Roman mythology I’ve read, Hectate is called a goddess of witchcraft and Circe a witch, and there’s probably other examples I don’t know of. However, I’m not really sure what being a witch would mean outside of the context of Christianity or modern pop-culture. Was this just something that was added in by much later writers?

Well, what is a witch, exactly? Ugly old woman, warty nose, pointy hat, flies around on broomsticks, brews potions in cauldrons, turns people into newts, weighs the same as a duck, that sort of thing? Circe, Hecate and Medea aren’t witches in that sense, no; they predate that stereotype of what a “witch” is by a good couple of millennia. Continue reading “Anonymous asks:” →

RandomAccess64 asks:

I personally always liked the fan Pokémon concept of basing a poison/ice type after a cold, with a counterpart poison/fire type after a fever.

And Anonymous asks:

When I think Ice/Poison, my mind first goes to pollution. Some sort of frozen sludge monster, perhaps, or a rotting corpse trapped under a layer of permafrost, its putrescence leaking into the surrounding environment.

Some interesting ideas! The cold/fever one could definitely be played with in some neat ways… maybe as alternate forms of a single Pokémon, even? If it’s a disease-based Pokémon, it might need to spread illnesses in order to keep itself healthy, which could make training one a challenge. The rotting corpse might be pushing it for a Pokémon game – I don’t know if Game Freak would go for that one – but the sludge monster idea sort of makes me want to see a Polar Muk regional variant.

Anonymous asks:

This isn’t a question but I wish I had you as a history teacher when I was in school – history was always my weakest subject and I genuinely enjoy the way you explain things, it actually helps me understand without zoning out!

Sorry for leaving this one languishing in the inbox for so long. And thank you! That really means a lot, as someone who, uh… actually does have to teach history sometimes, to students who are often less than enthusiastic at the prospect.