N asks:

What pokémon do you think best represents each social media site (Facebook, Twitter, Tumbler)


Well, Twitter is Chatot, right?  It’s a useless annoying bird that never shuts up and has appalling political opinions.

Facebook is Audino; it hears everything, and although it means well, it’s complicit in a vast system of oppression with horrifying global consequences that are beyond its ability to understand or control.

MySpace is clearly Lileep, because it’s an extinct vegetable with no personality.

Obviously Instagram is Smeargle; it’s obsessed with pictures and looks really interesting but is actually useless.

And Snapchat must be Minior, because it’s flashy and attention-grabbing but only lasts a few minutes.

Tinder… I think Tinder is Heatmor, because it seems like a good way to light a spark, but is actually clunky, mechanical and inexplicably covered in ants.

Now fµ¢£ing Grindr, Grindr is Morelull – it’s a Fairy-type mushroom that constantly flashes at you and really isn’t as big as it thinks it is.

4chan is Spiritomb; it has a hundred and eight distinct souls, but unfortunately all of them are awful.

Which means Tumblr has to be Garbodor.  It’s literal fµ¢£ing garbage from hell and really should have been set on fire a long time ago, but people love it anyway because it accepts them for who they are.

I hate Twitter

so you should all follow me on Twitter @pokemaniacal, to make it feel slightly less awful and pointless

that way you can all enjoy important and topical discussions like this:

as well as dumb random brainfarts like this:

and receive ongoing status updates on how bad my Japanese is:

Also I guess I usually tweet when I make a blog post, so if you want to be notified when that happens, this is one way to go about it.

seriously though Twitter is an awful place and you should all stay the fµ¢£ away from it if you can, but if you’re on that nightmare of a website anyway you should follow me so I can at least pretend that having an account is a net positive in my life

The Twitter’s Back

So, Jim the Editor has reminded me that I have a Twitter account, @pokemaniacal, which I was sort of hoping he would never do because I’m very bad at Twitter and I hate it. I tried to actually tweet things for a few months back in 2012, then gave up and just set it to tweet links whenever I posted something to Tumblr, and even that apparently stopped in early 2016 (presumably because Tumblr broke something, #fucktumblr). But I’m gonna give it another go, since I’m in a sort of rebranding phase with the new website and the Patreon page and everything, and maybe I can #engage my #followers by joining the #conversation (#hashtag #pleasekillme). So if you want to get notifications when I post something, or just hear whatever dumb brainfarts I decide to post there, go check it out.