Regular operations (or at least, as regular as things ever are around here) will resume shortly. In the mean time, this is just some stuff that I wrote for the Nuzlocke story that, upon reflection, doesn’t actually fit anywhere into the next proper episode – Luna the psychopathic Skitty and Fisher the Psyduck priest talking about Fisher’s devout Helicism. There may or may not be more of these in future – it really depends entirely on whether I feel ‘inspired.’
Fisher: Lady Luna, I must say your commitment to the path of Holy Anarchy has been an inspiration to me these past days.
Luna: If you mean my facility for murder, I can only assure you it is intended purely to serve my own amusement. Any religious epiphanies it might cause you to experience are quite incidental.
Fisher: Oh, but how could it be otherwise, my lady? Anarchy serves no cause but its own – just as you do. It is not through conscious effort but by following our whims, as they occur to us, that we draw closer to the will of the Blessed Helix.
Luna: So your faith, in fact, encourages wanton slaughter?
Fisher: Er… not exactly. Not all of us experience murderous impulses quite so… prolific as yours. But such things are a part of the Helix’s divine will, it is true. After all, was not the Archangel born into this world in a torrent of sacrificial blood?
Luna: I can only assume that the answer to your question is ‘yes.’ Well, I suppose if nothing else your theology is… refreshing. Although I can’t say I think much of your chances in your quest for new converts. Kalosians are a dull bunch, for the most part.
Fisher: My lady, I hope this is not an impertinent question, but… in my faith, priests such as myself spend years, sometimes decades, meditating in the hopes that we will hear what we call… the Voices. The manifestations of a divine will that exists beyond even the Helix. Even the greatest masters consider themselves blessed to be able to listen to them for a minute or two at a time… I myself have only ever heard one word, the word that sent me here, to Kalos. “Start.”
Luna: Get to the point, Fisher; it would be so dreary to have to explain to the Pidgeotto why I had sewn your beak shut with a length of your aorta.
Fisher: Er… of course, my lady. You see, Scripture tells us too of heroes, like the legendary Red, to whom the Voices spoke clearly every minute of every day – paragons of Holy Anarchy. I wonder… my lady, have you ever heard such things? Have you ever felt a compulsion to… turn this world Up-Start-Down?
Luna: The only ‘voices’ I have any interest in are my own greed, cruelty and darkly whimsical sense of humour. Begone, duck. I am in no mood for your evangelism today.